21. Anti-gravity shoe invention

“When it’s over, I want to say: all my life I was a bride married to amazement. I was the bridegroom, taking the world into my arms. “
Mary Oliver

1. The meeting began in an unorthodox manner, even for Speakers’ Corner. Mirko explained to us his latest invention: anti-gravity shoes.

I am not making this up. Nor was he kidding us. Mirko fully believes in his ideas.

HIs idea is to attach magnets to the footpaths, and magnets to the soles of our shoes. The magnets would repel each other and make it easier for us to lift our feet. “One stride could be ten metres” he told us, eyes bright.

His plan was flawless, except for the bit where he said the magnets in the footpath would be positive, and our shoe magnets would be negative. Uncle Pete charitably pointed out that if that were the case, we would stick to the footpath. Ex-electrician Mirko would have none of that. He rejected the idea that for his plan to work we would have to use magnets with the same polarity.

Honestly, I really am not making this up.

It is fair to say that Mirko did not receive the support he expected. As a result he was a right royal pest to Mr B for most of the day.

2. Peter the Youngerstood on the Ladder of Knowledge to say a few words about global warming, as did John August. But John left in a hurry after a remark about “old farts”.

3. Your scribe can’t tell you what Steve Maxwell, Helmut or Ray talked about, but late in the day we had a passer-by get up and speak. His name is Sashin and he spoke about the necessity for veganism. Try his colourful website.

Sashin’s talk prompted Mark the Grinner to offer us vegan recipes. He also offered recipes for left-handed people and rangas (people with red hair). As cannibalism is still against the law, no one took up his offer.

4. Mark the Grinner and Uncle Pete were busy being pests. They entertained everyone except the speakers with their witty remarks. Here are just some of the discussions they interrupted:
The Just World Theory.Do you blame the other person for their plight because you feel powerless to help them?

The  Tyranny of the Should. Get rid of the ‘shoulds’, ‘oughts’ and ‘musts’ in your life and become relaxed and easygoing.

– The Newstart Allowance. “It’s more than enough”, said Mr B, “especially with the added rental allowance of $122.40.” Thankfully he didn’t go so far to say that people on Newstart are living in luxury.
The figures on this linkdon’t include the $122.40 per fortnight rental assistance.

– Can the laws of physics, created 13.8 billion years ago in the Big Bang, be applied to the universe of light that existed before then (according to Helmut)? Indeed, were the laws created in the Big Bang at all?  Could they have existed before then?

– Did Scott Morrison’s love of the Game of Thrones help him win over the disinterested swinging voter and help the coalition win the election?
There’s no coal in ‘coalition’. Oh, wait, there is.

– Why can’t a cricketer choose to take three runs instead of four, if she hits a boundary? The one answer put forth was unsatisfactory.

– Do people with wacky ideas have them because they have neglected to think deeply about the implications of their belief?

– “What is the biggest problem facing the world?” asked someone. Mr B replied: “Overpopulation.” Mr B then got stuck into us, and three grannies then got stuck into Mr B.

– The history of hecklers. (See last Thursday’s post for a full description)

– Are there any wealthy people not struggling financially?

– Why do new smokers, before they are properly addicted, not see that cigarettes could be becoming a problem for them, and stop while they still can?
From the Postsecretwebsite:

5. This week’s Unusual Critter is the Croatia Marten. It has not yet found the time to look at our Facebook page but promises to do so.