1.The speaker and hecklers who turned up were drenched by torrential rain. Peter, Jean and Albert had a long way home, and it’s hoped none of them caught pneumonia. And, we hope David’s bike doesn’t rust.
The few minutes we had were enjoyable. Except for Albert’s rude poem, which was way too offensive for Speakers’ Corner.
For those rainy occasions in future, Speakers’ Corner will from now on be selling this fashionable footwear for today’s modern woman.
2. Check your calendar and you will see the year 2015 has ended. Here are a few snippets of what went on.
3. To the rangers patrolling the area: Thank you!
We speakers find you easygoing and polite. We particularly appreciate the fact that you don’t notice our car parked briefly nearby as we unload and load our chairs. That makes such a difference! Again, thank you!
May all your eggs be double-yolkers.
4. Peter the Heckler is beginning to come out of his shell. His gradual, almost glacial rise in self-confidence has been perceptible, and heartening to see. We at Speakers’ Corner like to think we have played a small part in ameliorating a little of his chronic shyness. As the video below indicates, there are signs that in 2016 Peter might finally shrug off his timidity and say what he thinks. What do you think?
5. This scribe found an objectionable broach for sale in the weeks leading up to Christmas. The advertisement’s headline? ‘Merry Christmas From Heaven’. The broach manages to combine love, death, grief, religion and Christmas to make four short lines of unforgivable schmaltz:
I love you all dearly,
now don’t shed a tear,
I’m spending my Christmas
With Jesus this year.
Quick, take a tablet to settle your stomach. Or, read this antidote provided by a friend, Jon Jermey. He wrote:
I thought I’d be dining
With Grandma as well,
But Jesus just told me
She’s burning in Hell.
And Uncle DuPree,
Who ran off with a bimbo?
No Christmas for him,
‘Cos he’s still in Limbo.
Don’t let Auntie Em’s
Christmas pudding defeat you.
If you choke on a sixpence,
I’ll be here to meet you.